Sunday, January 5, 2014

PowerHouse 2014 Summit: Authenticity and Community

Day 98 of 100 Days of Blogging

Authenticity and Community

"The more in vibrational sync you are with who you really are, then the more you are allowing only those things that you're wanting, and the less resistance there is. And the less resistance there is, then the less delay between the idea of the thought and the receiving of it." - Esther Hicks & Abraham

Last week, I was on the beach thinking about what it means to be authentic in community. I was thinking about how many things we keep hidden from each other to "save face", to hide shame and guilt, to pretend we have it all together and to keep our deepest desires hidden. Sharing our lives, our hearts and our secrets can provide beautiful spaces for connection, trust and healing together. Sharing secrets can free us individually and collectively. When we have the courage to be real and connect with others, it frees everyone.

I am excited to be a part of this Video Summit on Tuesday, January 7, 2014. (Every day from January 6-10, 2014 there are several speakers. Nine women total.)

Powerhouse 2014 Summit: Authenticity and Community.

If interested, you can sign up here for free.

Watch the short video and share a secret or two with us. A hidden desire, a hidden fear, a hidden passion...

Friday, December 20, 2013

Tell Me a Secret...

Day 97 of 100 days of Blogging

Last spring, I was with a group of 100 people at a social event at the Hotel W in Hollywood. After everyone arrived, we broke into small groups of five and went out into the streets of Hollywood with a scavenger list of activities.

One of the "tasks" was to ask three people to tell you a secret. It was fun to see the different reactions on each person's face from excitement to confusion as they shared a variety of secrets.

I approached a man, who looked like he was in his 30's, standing in line to get into a club and asked him the question: Tell me a secret.

He looked around at the other people and looked at me asking if I was serious. I shared the details of our group activity and asked him again to Tell me a Secret.

He paused for a moment and then leaned towards my ear as he whispered, "I do yoga." I was confused. "Is that a secret?" I asked him. He looked around to see if anyone was listening. "Yes. My friends would make fun of me, if they knew." It really hit me in that moment how much we hide from each other and how it actually disconnects us from ourselves.

How many of us have secrets that we think we can't share with the people who are closest to us? And what does that do to hold us back from speaking our deepest desires and connecting with each other. How does that stop us from living our fullest expression.

Today! Let's connect!

In the comments section, post a secret desire.

Let's see and feel each other.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

A Little Dream Comes True

Day 96 of 100 Days of Blogging

When I was growing up, I had the wish that I would have an older brother and sister. My older brother would get me dates and my sister would advise me. When I first had this desire, I was 13 years old, the oldest child with a sister two years younger than me and a brother who was seven years younger.

In that wish, there was an underlying desire to have older siblings who would help me to navigate life. I was so confused about how to fit in and where I belonged and how to dress and how to make new friends in my new school at a time when I felt so awkward.

Today I had an unexpected moment of having an experience of having an older brother. Somehow in this experience, it felt like everything was right with the world.

I asked one of my housemates, Erik, to get my bike down from the ceiling chains in the garage. He decided to ride his bike to the beach, too. The whole time we were riding I felt like I was his little sister. We didn't plan it. It just happened that the organic interaction between us brought up these feelings.

He carried the bikes out to the driveway and then lifted my bike into the air and over the car that was parked in the driveway and onto the sidewalk. He told me to go first as we headed down the street. As we approached Venice Boulevard, a busy street he told me when to cross the street and showed me where to stay on the bike path between cars . He followed me for one block then told me he was going to ride fast to the stop light. When he got there, he waited for me. During the 2 mile ride to the beach, he wove back and forth speeding up and slowing down and turning his head back to check on me.

At the beach there was no direct entrance onto the bike path. Erik rode up a grassy path, over a hill, through a mud ravine to the bike path and I followed him, the way a little sister who wants to keep up and be included would do. With a full water bottle, a heavy bike lock and a blanket in my basket, I couldn't make the sharp turn onto the path. I wiped out on the sand and fell landing on my thumb. I could feel the pulsing of a sprain. Still shaky I climbed back on the bike and peddled fast to catch up. I took the lead and wove around two tight curves. With an encouraging tone, he said, "That was so great! You made it around the tight curves." Big brother words of encouragement after the spill.

We rode on the path for awhile and then parted to run errands and do the activities we each wanted to do at the beach.

In that moment, I felt warm and tingly and happy. I had my big brother~little sister moment.

A Little Dream Came True...

Monday, September 30, 2013

Fearless Voices Introduction by Andrea Hylen

Day 95 of 100 days of Blogging

Heal My Voice is an organization committed to empowering women to heal a story in their life, reclaim personal power and step into greater leadership at the dinner table, in their communities and in the world.

Fearless Voices is the first book in a series of three books published in 2012 and 2013.

Introduction by Andrea Hylen, Founder of Heal My Voice (March 2012)

During the last nine months, twenty-two women gathered in a circle in the form of a secret Facebook group, with weekly phone calls, and in-person gatherings. The focus of our connection was to write a story that would heal an experience in our lives.

In the writing, the gentle reading and editing, the listening and support, using vulnerability as power, our voices emerged clearer and stronger. 




There are a lot of details I could write about our time together and I am on a mission. I don’t have a lot of time to bring you into the story. So, I am going to get right to the point.

Women are only using a small percentage of their voices. 

I don’t have any scientific proof like the studies that have been conducted on the brain. You know the studies, the ones that say we are only using a small percentage of our brains?

I will venture to say that women are only using a small percentage of their voices; a small percentage of their infinite potential; a small percentage of their unique, beautiful gifts and wisdom. My proof comes from being a woman, working with women, gathering in community with women, raising three daughters, volunteering as a Girl Scout Leader and a Destination Imagination Coach and witnessing women in all areas of my life.

I have witnessed their brilliance, their hearts and seen how powerful they are when no one is looking, when no one can see, when no one can hurt them and when someone believes in them. I have seen them stand up for other people but rarely for themselves.

Here is what I have also seen:

We apologize when we have done nothing wrong. We are afraid to ask for what we want. We are afraid to take up too much space. We think that other people have the answers for how we should live our lives. We hold on too tight. We give up too easily. We call each other names, put each other down, gossip instead of having direct, honest conversations. We whine, use passive-aggressive behavior, we learn to manipulate, back stab and hide as we go around the back door to try to get what we want. 

It is time for that to change and many of us have made the choice to do that. We are courageous. We are fearless. We are healing an old story and we are practicing with our newly discovered voices until it becomes a natural way of living, of speaking, of honoring our words, our wisdom and acknowledging and celebrating each other.

It is time for women to heal their voices in communities where they can practice, feel safe, be seen and heard and heal from the wounds from trauma, loss, grief and abuse. And from that newly healed, grounded place, we are learning to fully express who we really are.

In the Heal My Voice book circles and letter writing projects, we believe healing an old story leads women to a richer expression of their unique gifts and leadership and gives them more access to the full expression of their voice. 

When a woman is nurtured in community and given a space to speak about what she feels, thinks and wants, she heals her voice and begins to speak from a place of wisdom. She learns to listen to her inner guidance. She asks for support when she needs it. She taps into her vulnerability and uses it as power. She discovers her innate wisdom.

Why does it matter now?

Things are rapidly changing in the world. We are in a time of breakdown. The old structures are crumbling. And we have the chance to rebuild, rethink, and release things that no longer work. Women standing together and standing side by side with men is what is needed. We need the full expression of who we are. Connected to our hearts; Listening to and acting from inspiration; Joining together to lift humanity. We can’t heal the planet when we ourselves are emotionally and spiritually wounded. 

The mission is to empower a community of women who heal a story in their lives, reconnect with their inner authority, and discover the next steps in leadership. Women in community expressing vulnerability, supporting each other, encouraging, laughing, connecting, collaborating and celebrating life.

As Marianne Williamson wrote in, “A Return to Love:”

“Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

We are no longer just saying the words. We have gathered in community, healing our voices, giving each other permission and liberating each other. We are living this now.

This is the first of a series of books that are being created in communities of women around the world. This is a series of Voices individually and collectively breaking through into new territory and a new world.

We begin with Fearless Voices. We are ready now.

Book of stories is available on Amazon:

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Intimacy and Vulnerability and Going to the Dentist

Day 94 of 100 days of Blogging

I am leaning in and posting this as a blog because I refuse to run away and hide.

I spent a few hours chatting on FB the other day with a FB friend who I recently met in person. We were talking about desire, sharing some of our stories, becoming more  and intimacies.

He wrote, "Can I ask you an intimacy?" I said, "Yes." He said, "What about your teeth?"

I am so grateful for the gentle way the intimacy was delivered. I am so grateful for all of the feelings and emotions that have come up and for the action that it inspired me to take.

Up until 4 years ago, I regularly went to the dentist. My teeth have always been a weak area in my body system and during my 4 pregnancies and the 19 months of my son's birth and death, I always lost one or two teeth. In 2009, I was having some major restoration work done and then someone's bankruptcy that year wiped out $200,000 which was all of my money. All dental care stopped and I just learned to deal with the unfinished work and missing teeth.

I am just getting back on my feet financially this year. Two weeks ago, one of my housemates and I were talking about finding a dentist and I was still procrastinating. Then, I cracked a tooth and I have been self-conscious about it. Getting my teeth fixed is one of the things on my desire list for this year. It has been an example of where I put my own self care last and this is the year I am changing that.
The feelings that came up in the intimacy are intermixed with shame and compassion. My mind is like a wild animal with it sometimes. I feel a wave of shame and I think “I can’t see him again until all of the work is done on my teeth. Until I fix them all."

And so I have decided to do the thing that I know is the stretch, the through line, the way to change. I am posting it publicly. I am saying it out loud. I am going to start smiling the way I used to and love myself in the process while I am still getting my teeth repaired.

The day after the intimacy was delivered, I found a dentist. I have already had my teeth cleaned and scheduled an appt in October to get the first tooth fixed. My goal is to get something repaired every month and within a year have all of the restoration work complete.

Boom! Take that shame! Throwing you out the door and living life as I am today.

Thank you Facebook friend.

Friday, September 20, 2013

I am Powered by Orgasm.

Day 93 of 100 days of blogging

 I used to connect the word orgasm to the act of climax during intercourse. As I have been exploring the power of orgasm as an energy over the last year, I have found that I like this definition better.

Orgasm:  A similar point of intensity of emotional excitement.

It describes the energy that pulses through me when I am excited about living life. Excited about being free to be me. Excited because I feel a wide range of emotions. Excited because I am in the flow of orgasm.

It is the Power of Orgasm that:

...fueled me to leave my first husband and break free of old beliefs and patterning and find my voice.

It is the Power of Orgasm that:

...inspired me to home school my children with creativity and adventure.
It is the Power of Orgasm that:

...compelled me to go to 78 Jonas Brothers concerts in 2 1/2 years with my teenage daughter.

It is the Power of Orgasm that:

...moved me to host 44 internet radio shows in 45 days when I had never hosted a radio show before.

It is the Power of Orgasm that:

...pulsed through me to start the organization Heal My Voice.

"Orgasm" to me is a superpower energy that encourages me to say, "YES!", that pushes me into the world, that inspires me with the juice in my desire to experience as much as I possibly can while I am living life!


Friday, September 6, 2013

Drop Out, Unplug and Enjoy by Ann Quasman, Guest Blogger

Day 92 of 100 days of Blogging
Guest Blogger FRIDAY!
Drop Out, Unplug and Enjoy
By Ann Quasman
For the past several years, I’ve been on vacation and it’s always nice to get away.  But, one part of me never went on vacation. The autopilot part of me that still needed to get work done and take care of business – even if I was several states away, and had people lined up to take care of the most important things – the had-to-do “stuff” that needed to get done.
So often, after a full day of playing, seeing things, doing nothing…. you know, vacation “stuff”, I would stay up late at night doing work “stuff”.  What’s wrong with this picture? 
Well for one thing, I was on vacation.  For another, in the grand scheme of things, would it really make a difference if I slowed down for a week or two?  I think not.
This wisdom of realizing that it’s really ok to slow down has not been fast coming for me.  I dream about it.  I drool about it.  I even scoff when I see many men and women on vacation with a cell phone glued to their ears – obviously in touch with the office.
But who am I to scoff?  It’s taken at least four decades (assuming I did not have this disease when I was a child or teenager) for me to say, “Whooaaaa.”  I am sure that a psychologist would have a good time with me and pinpoint the root of it all.  Perhaps something in my pre-natal development.
But, I don’t need that analysis any more because some light bulb went off about a month before this last vacation.  Some voice from somewhere said, “TAKE A REAL VACATION.”  And, it was LOUD.  That’s why I used capital letters.
So, I did.  I must admit there were some feelings of guilt and shame that popped up that first day or two.  But, I got on my bicycle and road.  I road long and hard, ate great food, took long naps, laughed a lot, and soaked up the incredible beauty of Vermont.  And, it was good.  Real good.
Guess what?  My little world had not fallen apart or been flushed down the toilet while I was gone.  Now, I did have twenty gazillion emails to buzz through when I returned.  A small price to pay for a REAL vacation.
I urge you… if you have the “must get work done at all costs” disease, try to do something about it now.  Don’t wait until you’re a “more mature” woman like me.  Get your work done during your work time.  When you go on vacation… go on vacation.  When you need some down time… make space for it.
You’ll be amazed at what blossoms within you when you do.
Would love to hear how you “get away” – really get away and take care of yourself.


Ann Quasman is a woman on a mission. Her goal is to encourage and facilitate conscious conversations that will help women connect with and rely upon the wisdom within their hearts as much as they do the wisdom within their minds. As host of WomanTalk Live Radio on Talkradio 680 WCBM Baltimore and the Creator of Conscious Conversations Café, Ann brings women everywhere deeper into topics that both inspire and inform and she provides women a platform to share their voices and be heard.  Ann’s mantra is, “I’m available.”  She knows that when you say those words and mean it, magic happens.